I loved you.
I know you love me, too.
We met as soon as I graduated
into a broken economy. It was when I
couldn’t coin my poems, I allowed you to
Occupy my confidence. Even when the
realization of adulting gained weight,
you shoved an orange polished finger down
my throat, forcing me to spew raw confessions
of love all over my responsibilities.
Is that what you wanted? Did you
need me to snort your essence
that way I’d always come back for
another hit when the world beat me down
just enough for me to admit I can’t do a
damn thing without you?
I loved you.
Your blanket gave me safety,
and as we cuddled, I’d lay my head
on your bosom and we’d begin every conversation
with “hey…you remember when…?”
getting me to sink further and further into that dark
place of apathy allowing you to take me for a ride
around the edges of the city but we’d never truly enter
I can’t anymore, I’ve tried and failed to breath under your
coat and realized it’s no longer in season. I thought you pushed me forward
but you were feeding me false senses of progress. I thought our love was present
but I’m still stuck on the 90s playlist because hey…those were
the best songs, right?
But it’s time, time I get into a relationship with myself.
Time to sever my frostbitten limb and reclaim my
strength. So I will end my letter with a simple goodbye,
nostalgia, my love.
P.S. I hope we can still be friends.
DJ Lawrence, stage name Daedalus Chaos, is a traveling spoken word artist and writer. He has performed in several countries around Europe and is currently residing in Warsaw, Poland, creating numerous English-speaking events and open mics.
His poetry covers the need for poets to come together and form a community sans border in today’s society.